more daily frustrations with Asher’s father… i wish that i could say that every day is ‘roses’ in my house, but that would be a lie. I do my very best to keep a smile on my face during the day for the boys. They do not need to ‘see’, let alone ‘know’ about the daily drama’s that seem to follow our little family.
.. I do my best to shield them from the outside forces that are ‘attacking’ from what seems like about ’4 corners’ at the moment… and they will NEVER hear a bad word about ANY of those ‘bad forces’.. … they will not hear it from ‘me’.. and i will NOT allow any bad mouthing about anyone else in my house either..
This is all easily controlled at the moment, Asher is not even 2yrs old yet and just beginning his verbal skills. .. no complete, solid sentences yet. … one of my greatest fears, is for when he ‘has’ those complete sentences … and is coming home from his long weekends with his father..
… and Gavin… just watching all of this ‘play out’… he does not know what is going on? but yes he does… he is closing off in some ways and it is breaking my heart.. every time that he sees me being quiet?? he knows that Asher’s dad has done something again.. what? he will not be told.. but he does not need it.. it just makes him more mad.. and then he closes off and goes to his room and stays there by himself for a while until he calms himself down… ;(
then i end up with a picture from him that is very sweet followed by a little cuddling.. 
My boys are soooo sweet and sooo special. I am not sure how i am this lucky to have been blessed with these precious angels. They have been through so much, yet they both are the most amazingly sweet, happy, polite and well behaved boys ever. … i love them “more than all the love in the whole wide world” (that is what Gavin tells me)
